Having unrealistic expectations about your partner will just disappoint you and will make you wonder about anything that is missing in your relationship. Common problems in marriage usually arise because of unrealistic assumptions you make when you go into marriage.
This is not uncommon, as there are many married couples in the same predicament. Let us discuss below some expectations that usually happen at the start of the marriage.
1. There will never be conflicts in the marriage
It will not always be a cheerful atmosphere at home, and you will not be smiling all the time because you are finally together, married. Both of you will now face the realities of life and the common problems in a marriage that you need to sort out together.
The honeymoon stage will not last for years, but there will be bittersweet moments in your marriage. You have to be ready for such.
2. Your partner will always understand you
It is not that easy to understand yourself, let alone someone else to always gauge what you are feeling. Sometimes you have moods you can’t explain, that you want to be alone or you just want silence and to be by yourself.
This is not something that the other person will automatically understand unless you let them know you need some time by yourself. If the other person loves you, they will understand and give you the space that you need.
3. There is no need to work at your marriage
It is such an unrealistic notion that many newlyweds have. Marriage is more of a compromise, and each of you must have the patience to understand the other. It will not always you who will have the last say and will not be the other person who will always be correct.
Both of you will need to understand that with compromise, marriage will last.
4. You will never argue
Even a child argues with her parents, and a couple will argue about the simplest things. This is how you get to understand the other person and how you will learn patience. Patience is the key when a couple argues cause the argument will not stop, and it will continue without resolve. When you are patient with the other person, you learn to ask calmly, whatever bothers them, and this is the start of cool arguments where both of you win.
5. Your partner will always worry about your happiness
This is not always the case in a married couple and is a sadly common problem in marriage.
When the other partner assumes her partner will always make them happy, and they will live happily. You cannot rest on your happiness on the other person cause you need to find it within yourself and how you can make yourself happy.
Sometimes the other person can disappoint you, let you down, and will not compromise. By having such unrealistic expectations, you are just saving yourself up for heartaches in the marriage.
6. The partner will always look pretty or handsome
There is no guarantee that the person you married today will look like the same person after a few years. Both of you can gain weight, have white hairs, or even some wrinkles and flaps. The husband may go bald, and the wife may not be as attractive.
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7. No need to say sorry to your partner
When you did something wrong with your partner, you must say you are sorry. Your partner may not require you to say it, but saying it anyway will make a marriage stronger.
This will show that you worry about how your partner will feel, and you must let them know you don’t mean to offend or hurt them.
8. No need to work at your marriage cause it will always stay the same
When you are married, there are a lot of trials that you have to face together. Another person may get sick, the other may cheat, but it is how you handle things together that will matter.
9. It is easy to solve problems, particularly when you are married
Well, some problems are easy to solve when you are married, and some don’t have any way of resolving and keeps on popping up.
A different way of solving issues is another common problem in the marriage cause both of you must be in sync with how you will solve problems that arise.
10. The one you married is your soulmate
Sorry to disappoint you, this is not always the case. There are married couples that immediately asked themselves if they made the right decision since they are not compatible with their partner. Sometimes some people agreed that they finally found their soul mate only after a few tries in marriage.
11. Your partner will always be the same person
There are common problems in marriage, and this is one of them. Partners thinking that the one they married will always be the same loving, honest and hardworking person.
They realized after a few years that their partner is the opposite of their expectation and that they assumed wrong.
12. That you will always be happy after marriage
There are no married couple who can attest to this because at one point during their marriage, they have been miserable or discontented.
The key is to learn how to get along with your spouse and find out how you can be happy, even with the shortcomings and faults of your partner.
13. You and your partner will always be in agreement
This is the usual reason some married couples separate because they can’t agree with each other. They have different beliefs, views, and have mixed opinions.
It can be different political views, unlike faith, and even as simple as disagreement in the food you both eat.
You will have some problems if you let such conflict come between the two of you. It is in living together and learning how to be the perfect person you can be for your partner cause that is how love should be- making the other person happy and contented. Yet, making sure that you are taking care of your happiness as well.
